Those NME Top 500 Songs in full*

By Everett True

Wait. I haven’t yet had a chance to read the NME‘s most-recent version of their top 500 songs of all time – as opposed to the top 500 albums, or 150 best tracks of the last 15 years, or top 100 singles and songs of all-time, or 100 best tracks of the decade, or 100 greatest songs of NME‘s lifetime, or 100 Greatest Britpop songs, or 100 Best Songs of the 60s, or the greatest Number 1 Songs in History, or 501 Lost Songs you need to hear now, or… (all of these are genuine ‘stories’).

Let me guess the top 20. (Credit where credit’s due: I nicked the image from The Quietus article around a similar topic.)

1. Nirvana – Smells Like Teen Spirit
2. Joy Division – Teen Spirit Will Tear Us Apart
3. Some dance track from the 70s to show how open-minded we are
4. The Smiths – How Soon Is Teen Spirit?
5. Something released after 2000 to show how current we are
6. Pulp – Common Deodorant
7. Arctic Monkeys – I Bet You Look Good Wearing Teen Spirit
8. New Order – Blue (Teen) Spirit
9. The Ronettes – Be My Deodorant
10. The Beach Boys – Good Perspirations
11. Some track released by The Beatles for all the ‘classic rock’ lovers out there
12. The Smiths – There Is A Deodorant That Never Runs Out
13. Oasis – Sweat Forever
14. The Beach Boys – Kurt Only Knows
15. David Bowie – B.O.’s
16. The White Stripes – Teen Spirit Army
17. Another track released by The Beatles. I mean, they are the greatest band of all time and everything
18. Some dance track released after 2000 go show how open-minded AND current we are
19. Blondie – Bottle of Teen Spirit
20. Blur – Girls & Teen Spirit

*not in full at all then, but neither is it the Top 500 Songs.

by Everett True

My name is Everett True. I am a music critic. This is what I do. I criticise music. The clue is in my job description – music critic. I do not consider myself a journalist, as I do not research or report hard news. I do not consider myself a commentator as I believe that everyone should be a participant. I criticise people and in return I am not surprised if other people criticise me. It is part of the whole deal of being in the public arena. I am Everett True. Believe in me and I have power like a God. Quit believing in me and I no longer exist.