The return of Everett True | 156. Slum Of Legs

We’re going on a song hunt.
We’re going to find a great one.
What a beautiful day!
We’re not scared.

Uh-uh! Riot Grrrl
Scary, caring Riot Grrrl.
We can’t go over it.
We can’t go under it.

Oh no!
We’ve got to go through it!

Roar-rrrrah!
Roar-rrrrah!
Roar-rrrrah!

We’re going on a song hunt.
We’re going to find a great one.
What a beautiful day!
We’re not scared.

Uh-uh! A guitar!
A wailing, flailing guitar.
We can’t go over it.
We can’t go under it.

Oh no!
We’ve got to go through it!

Wail-waah!
Wail-waah!
Wail-waah!

We’re going on a song hunt.
We’re going to find a great one.
What a beautiful day!
We’re not scared.

Uh-uh! Emotion!
Thick oozing emotion.
We can’t go over it.
We can’t go under it.

Oh no!
We’ve got to go through it!

Squelch squerch!
Squelch squerch!
Squelch squerch!

We’re going on a song hunt.
We’re going to find a great one.
What a beautiful day!
We’re not scared.

Uh-uh! A melody!
A soaring, hopeful melody.
We can’t go over it.
We can’t go under it.

Oh no!
We’ve got to go through it!

Sing trrrring!
Sing trrrring!
Sing trrrring!

We’re going on a song hunt.
We’re going to find a great one.
What a beautiful day!
We’re not scared.

Uh-uh! A drumbeat!
A rollicking frolicking drumbeat.
We can’t go over it.
We can’t go under it.

Oh no!
We’ve got to go through it!

Boom-boom!
Boom-boom!
Boom-boom!

We’re going on a song hunt.
We’re going to find a great one.
What a beautiful day!
We’re not scared.

Uh-uh! A violin!
A  melancholy violin.
We can’t go over it.
We can’t go under it.

Oh no!
We’ve got to go through it!

Listen!
Listen!
Listen!
WHAT’S THAT?

One gorgeous trembling voice!
Two big furry guitars!
One gorgeous sad refrain!
IT’S A SONG!!!!

Quick! Back through the violin! Listen! Listen! Listen!
Back through the drumbeat! Boom-boom! Boom-boom!
Back through the melody! Sing trrrring! Sing trrrring! Sing trrrring!
Back through the emotion! Squelch squerch! Squelch squerch!
Back through the guitar! Wail-waah! Wail-waah! Wail-waah!
Back through the Riot Grrrl! Roar-rrrrah! Roar-rrrrah!

Get to our front door.
Open the door.
Up the stairs.

Oh no!
We forgot to load the record-player.
Back downstairs.

Load the record-player.
Back upstairs.
Into the bedroom.

Into bed.
Under the covers.

We’re not going on a song hunt again!

With apologies to Michael Rosen and Helen Oxenbury

by Everett True

My name is Everett True. I am a music critic. This is what I do. I criticise music. The clue is in my job description – music critic. I do not consider myself a journalist, as I do not research or report hard news. I do not consider myself a commentator as I believe that everyone should be a participant. I criticise people and in return I am not surprised if other people criticise me. It is part of the whole deal of being in the public arena. I am Everett True. Believe in me and I have power like a God. Quit believing in me and I no longer exist.