The 21 Inviolate Rules of Music Criticism (2012 version)
With thanks to Mof Gimmers, whose recent comment on this thread inspired this:
- Music critics are NOT fucking cool – never have been, never will be
- Music critics couldn’t give a shit about pleasing the crowd
- Music critics don’t give a shit about the Next Big Thing
- Music critics do not have friends
- Music criticism is not a stand-in for celebrity
- Music critics hate people who think everything’s OK really
- Music critics couldn’t give a fuck about getting their name on the door
- Music critics couldn’t give a fuck about pissing off ‘contacts’
- Music critics couldn’t give a fuck about impressing musicians
- Music critics couldn’t give a fuck about impressing readers
- Music critics couldn’t give a fuck about impressing themselves
- Music critics are not third-rate academics looking for some easy cash on the side
- Music critics couldn’t give a fuck about promotional budgets
- Music critics are not failed journalists
- Music critics are not failed musicians
- Music critics do not ‘meet and greet’
- Music critics do not hang out with other music critics
- Music criticism is not a stand-in for bedroom eyes
- Music criticism is not a band aid
- Music critics couldn’t give a fuck who they piss off
- Music critics DO NOT CARE about cool
Collapse Board: fighting to make music criticism unswervingly un-cool again.
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