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 Everett True

Nicki Minaj – Pink Friday Roman Reloaded (Universal)

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Nicki Minaj - Pink Friday Roman Reloaded

Great strapline from a recent Guardian article. Nice to see that women are no longer objectified: that talent is held up as more important than looks or a ‘smart mouth’ when it comes to talking about females.

She has a body like Marilyn and a mouth like Eminem. No wonder Nicki Minaj is the hottest female rapper in the world.

Or maybe it doesn’t matter when you don’t like the artist in question?

This following song is killer. The echoed percussion is spooky as all hell. Love the way the music is stripped-down, silence is used as an instrument. (I’m Everett True! Why wouldn’t I love that?) Classic Queen Bee refrain in the refrain. Stands out a moonlit mile.

Bitches ain’t shit and they ain’t saying nothin’
A hundred mothafuckas can’t tell me nothin’
I beez in the trap, be-beez in the trap
I beez in the trap, be-beez in the trap

Been listening to Nicki Minaj’s new album Pink Friday Roman Reloaded on the bus in this morning, all 22 illegally downloaded tracks of it. (Note to censors: this is, of course, artistic license. I’m fucken’ wi’tcha. No fucken’ way would I do shit like that. Jes’ makes it sound more real, ya feel me? Like rappers and shit bragging about bling when it’s just a song, not real life. Think about it.) Think the mock-Audrey Hepburn (My Fair Lady) vocals and sub-Crass appropriation of classical motifs on the opening track ‘Roman Holiday’ are so grating they’re borderline genius, the way shoving a foot-long Parmesan grater up my ass is fucking genius, the way it hurts but hurts so good. Think … wait, 22 fucken’ tracks? That’s way too much Nicki Minaj for my tastes. Especially when over half of it could be anyfuckingbody. I preferred it when I didn’t know how to pronounce her name. Minaj, as in minagerie, right? Exotic, yet base.

Been wondering who Nicki’s target audience might be. Six-year-old girls pissed off that they don’t get to … wait. I can’t write that … for another six years? Ask Ellen. She knows.

This next song’s great, too. Got to love the post-2001: A Space Odyssey swarm of bees backing track.

No one would be complaining the fuck out these lyrics if they weren’t by a female.

7up went and gave, my commercial to Cee-Lo
But don’t tell ‘em I said it, let’s keep it on the d-low
If you need you a look, just put me on your song
But you know it’ll cost, about six figures long
But you bitches ain’t got it, where the fuck is your budgets
Flying spurs for hers means I’m fuckin above it
And I just got a ghost and I’m callin it Casper
But this shit is so cold it belong in Alaska
Why da fuck I’m I stylin I competes with myself
When u win against Nicki u depleted your wealth
And I’m not masturbating but I’m feelin myself
Paparazzi is waitin cuz them pictures would sell
Yeah now don’t you feel stupid yeah dat’s egg on your face
If you wasn’t so ugly I’d put my dick in your face
Dick in your face put my dick in your face

I ain’t denying that she can be fucking annoying – whoever thought that ‘Barbie Girl’ updated for the Lady Gaga generation would sell? – but my main problem with Nicki Minaj is I know precisely which of my friends love her, without asking.

Is that a problem?

There ain’t that much of a leap from this:

to this:

Related posts: Suck My Minaj

9 Responses to Nicki Minaj – Pink Friday Roman Reloaded (Universal)

  1. Golightly April 30, 2012 at 12:44 pm

    Yeah… still underwhelmed by her. I think the thing I like best about her music is the synths and the beats. I like her rapping voice but can’t stand her singing voice even though she sings well. I absolutely can’t get over how stupid she looks… like worse than Katy Perry in the daft costume stakes. Although I am not a fan of Katy Perry’s music, I at least think her costumes create a well rounded aesthetic for her music which is pop. I honestly had no idea until now that Nicki Minaj was more of a filthy mouthed rap artist than a pop star… and maybe that is where the confusion and unfulfilled expectation came from. I thought with the way she has been marketed on tv and in magazines that she was half way between Katy Perry and Lady Gaga and Jessie J… but if you shut your eyes to the horrors of her music videos and try to forget that dayglo exists for a second, you start to hear some pretty dark, pulsing, understated sexy beats, a cool atmosphere and a great rapping voice with it’s I Don’t Give A Fuck pacing and tone. I guess I missed how cool she actually sounds when her music is peaking due to the distracting cartoon-drag queen visuals… her visuals are larger than life which creates a gap between that and her music that sounds like it plays it cool. I sort of wish she was dressed more like Lady Gaga in the Just Dance video because at least that was cool. Nicki Minaj sounds like she’s Odd Future’s girlfriend but looks like she’s escaped from the float of some tacky parade… and there’s a time and a place for both, but the two things don’t mix well. She almost looks like she’s stepped out of a children’s tv show for the under fives (obvs not when wearing skintight cut out cat suit with stripper heals though) and so to be dressed up as a panto dame and to sing like the female version of Odd Future is not inspiring, it’s fucking annoying. I want to look up to her and respect her, but I don’t know what’s going on there… quite literally the foulest mouthed music I’ve heard in ages dressed up and presented like children’s pick’n'mix sweets… but for adults. Some things clash and set things off in a new and inspiring way… but Nickie Minaj is not one of the for me. Because she doesn’t seem to pull it off, to me she looks like she’s trying to hard. I just don’t know what she’s trying too hard to do.

  2. Everett True April 30, 2012 at 12:51 pm

    That’s pretty fair, Hannah. Fancy expanding that into a blog entry for CB?

  3. Golightly April 30, 2012 at 12:53 pm

    I just think she comes close to being cool. And I don’t like her lyrics as much as you do ET. I also feel like none of it stuck in my head or begged me to relisten. Unlike Grimes earlier which despite being unusual, still got stuck on repeat in my head after two listens… and in a good way. I couldn’t even hum you a note of Nicki Minaj’s music if I tried. And I don’t even want to listen to it again to find out. Maybe some amazing remix will come along and change my mind (ie. cut out the cringe-worthy melodramatic singing bits and create some sort of hooky chorus and I’ll hear it in another context away from all that horrid neon paint)… but I won’t hold my breath.

  4. Golightly April 30, 2012 at 12:58 pm

    I blame Elton John.

  5. chris May 1, 2012 at 10:01 am

    Catchy, like the clap somehow.

  6. Jerome M May 3, 2012 at 2:34 am

    I’ve heard this album is half awesome and half terrible. The stuff I’ve heard on the radio hasn’t been all that great, so I don’t see where the incredible attraction is.

  7. John May 5, 2012 at 9:05 am

    This piece starts by criticising the press for focusing on looks as much as talent when it comes to women. The Madonna review, two posts down, starts by criticising Madonna for the way she looks before mentioning anything about music.

    Oh well.

  8. Everett True May 5, 2012 at 7:20 pm

    Well observed John. You’ll also have noticed, I’m sure, that the two articles are written by different people.

  9. Princess Stomper May 8, 2012 at 8:04 am

    Madonna sounds how she looks; Nicki doesn’t.

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