Know When To Fold ‘Em: The Sad Case of Jesus And Mary Chain’s Munki

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6. You’re singing about rock’n’roll

Singing about rock music is about as passe as you can get. Don’t believe me? Huey Lewis, dude. Bob Seger, dude. Let the dudes in the local bar bands sing the virtues of rock’n’roll. You’re better than that.

6a. You’re using other people’s song titles as your own

‘Birthday’. ‘Cracking Up’. ‘Man On The Moon’. ‘I Love Rock’N’Roll’. ‘Dream Lover’. Sidebar: ‘Moe Tucker’? ‘Supertramp’? Naming your songs after other bands/people? Not done. Well, if you’re a hack, maybe.

7. Your album has 17 songs

Unless your name is Bob Pollard, or those songs are in the three-minute range, don’t attempt this. You think every single song you record is worth hearing? You’re deceiving yourself, and the truth is not in you. Munki is nearly twice the length of their debut, Psychocandy. Their previous album, Stoned & Dethroned, was guilty of the same crime, but was at least a cohesive record.

8. You mistake profane lyrics for edginess

Did you know that there is a clean version of Munki, released as a promo, by Sub Pop? That bodes the question: why? You can’t polish a turd, and you shouldn’t waste money cleaning up and sending a crap record to radio. Anyone can curse. Swear words may be edgy and funny and cool when you’re 17. For serious, veteran musicians like the JaMC, that they had descended into such juvenile behavior was a shocking thing to hear. It was so … unnecessary.

What I’ve written about isn’t a slam towards the band; it’s a simple reiteration of the facts, put forth by the band. As for me, I’m a huge fan of the band – even going so far to buy the reissue of their worst record, in hopes that time has changed my opinion of it. Munki made me sad when it came out. Bloated, rambling, and, well, mediocre. To me, the news of the band’s split wasn’t a surprise. One could see it coming. Does Munki hold up, or improve with age? I haven’t listened to it yet. Here’s hoping.

[Lest we forget – Ed]

Related posts: the first EVER review of Jesus And Mary Chain

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