Gender stereotyping begins at home | the worst video of 2015 so far

I don’t like being in agreement with everyone else, but… wow. Just wow.

It’s like the Christian far right in America have finally got the pop icon they so richly deserve, and we’re all travelling back to the 1950s on a shiny new time machine back to the age of the nuclear family where men were men and women were seen but not heard. The video is like a Tim Burton retro-vision except there’s NO FUCKING IRONY. It’s like the original Grease with all the…uh…grease taken away. A world where only the Sandys rule.

And the worst of it is… the song is SO DAMNABLY CATCHY – and I find the blue plastic skirt perversely sexy. (It’s so Romford, Essex 1977.)

As one of my KMB003 students puts it:

It’s as if some 1950s Don Draper style chauvinist marketing man jumped in a time machine, came to 2015 and wrote a faux doo-wop song as anti-feminist propaganda.

And, as another puts it:

It’s so heteronormative that it makes me uncomfortable.

Student 1: I AM SO ANGRY

Student 2: This makes my skin crawl…

S1: I dont see why Miley accrues such bad press when she at least promotes (largely) positive things whereas Meghan Trainor is seen as America’s sweetheart body-positive feminist icon and SHE’S JUST AWFUL.

S2: I completely agree. Miley is comfortable with her own body and sexuality. How is that not a more positive thing to teach girls? Especially when compared to the values promoted in this drivel? [And] little girls are going to be singing this all over YouTube.

—————————————-

I know it’s meant to be tongue in cheek. I know it’s not supposed to be taken seriously. BUT IT WILL BE, WON’T IT?

Regressive gender stereotyping, and all.

“Dear Future Husband”
Dear future husband,
Here’s a few things
You’ll need to know if you wanna be
My one and only all my life

Take me on a date
I deserve it, babe
And don’t forget the flowers every anniversary
‘Cause if you’ll treat me right
I’ll be the perfect wife
Buying groceries
Buy-buying what you need

You got that 9 to 5
But, baby, so do I
So don’t be thinking I’ll be home and baking apple pies
I never learned to cook
But I can write a hook
Sing along with me
Sing-sing along with me (hey)

You gotta know how to treat me like a lady
Even when I’m acting crazy
Tell me everything’s alright

Dear future husband,
Here’s a few things you’ll need to know if you wanna be
My one and only all my life
Dear future husband,
If you wanna get that special lovin’
Tell me I’m beautiful each and every night

After every fight
Just apologize
And maybe then I’ll let you try and rock my body right
Even if I was wrong
You know I’m never wrong
Why disagree?
Why, why disagree?

You gotta know how to treat me like a lady
Even when I’m acting crazy
Tell me everything’s alright

Dear future husband,
Here’s a few things
You’ll need to know if you wanna be
My one and only all my life (hey, baby)
Dear future husband,
Make time for me
Don’t leave me lonely
And know we’ll never see your family more than mine

I’ll be sleeping on the left side of the bed (hey)
Open doors for me and you might get some kisses
Don’t have a dirty mind
Just be a classy guy
Buy me a ring
Buy-buy me a ring, (babe)

You gotta know how to treat me like a lady
Even when I’m acting crazy
Tell me everything’s alright

Dear future husband,
Here’s a few things
You’ll need to know if you wanna be
My one and only all my life
Dear future husband,
If you wanna get that special loving
Tell me I’m beautiful each and every night

Future husband, better love me right

by Everett True

My name is Everett True. I am a music critic. This is what I do. I criticise music. The clue is in my job description – music critic. I do not consider myself a journalist, as I do not research or report hard news. I do not consider myself a commentator as I believe that everyone should be a participant. I criticise people and in return I am not surprised if other people criticise me. It is part of the whole deal of being in the public arena. I am Everett True. Believe in me and I have power like a God. Quit believing in me and I no longer exist.